Hair today

I was just reading my book when a long black hair dropped onto the page.
What the??
The girl in front of me is brushing her hair, vigorously, and is flinging scalp flakes, vermin eggs, hair and God knows what else all over me.
I can’t believe this!!! The inconsiderate little creep.
I gave her my ‘do you mind’ look - mixed in with a healthy dose of my incredulity look and she stops brushing immediately, with bad grace mind. THEN she cleans the brush, drops the hair ball on the floor and puts the brush back into her bag. What a grub.
But she hasn't finished. Now she has the foundation out, it’s liquid and she is applying it with a sponge. This task cannot be completed without elbowing the poor lady next to her, nor without blotting with a tissue (which joins the hair on the floor).
Blush is next. She is putting it on with a long handled brush with short bristles and she is flicking it backwards in my direction. The sun is coming through the window and the dust particles from the brush can be seen hurtling through the air to be filtered through the nostrils of anyone within a 5 metre radius. The poor lady next to her has a skin coloured film all over the left shoulder of her suit jacket.
Mascara is next. This is my opportunity to inflict some revenge for the hay fever attack that I’m sure to have in about ½ hour. Just as she puts the mascara brush up to her eye my leg becomes weary of staying still and starts to jump all over the place. I accidentally hit the back of the seat with my knee. Whoops, she has just smacked the mascara brush under her eye. Heeeeeee. She takes out another tissue and dabs away at the smudge (has to resort to a bit of spit on the tissue) then lines up for another go. This time the train jolts suddenly to the right. Wow that was a near miss, she nearly took out an eye. Another tissue, more spit, train hits a corner at 100 kms, hmmmmm nice moustache. Ahahahahahahahahahaa. Tissue, spit, throw tissue after the first one.
She gives up on the mascara for the time being and concentrates on patching up the damage. You know, if she gets this wrong she will end up looking like the scarecrow in the Wizard of Oz.
Here we go with lipstick now….this should be good. I could be a real bastard here but I refrain from trying to make her look like Bozo the clown. It’s killing me…..
She manages that one ok, how many lipsticks do you wear at once these days? This is her third colour.
I tell you, she really loves that mirror she’s holding onto too. I’m wondering if she should go and get herself a room the way she is carrying on.
By this time I’m not the only one who is fascinated and, lets face it, slightly revolted. The lady next to her is watching from the corner of her eye and a fellow over the way is watching in morbid facination. She has been ‘doing’ her face for a good 40 minutes. If she did this before she left for work she would have to get up a 4am just to be on time. The worst thing is that it doesn’t make her look any better, in fact she looks like a whore.
Argh, she is back to the hair! She is being careful to brush it away from me though.
This is just another case for the argument that the fabric of society has a big hole in it. What happened to consideration for others? By today’s standards I’m the one who’s a crackpot because I am angered by this behaviour. How does that work???
People never used to groom themselves in public. The main reason was because they had too much pride to go out the front door unless they were fully dressed and groomed. But it didn’t stop there, consideration for others was another factor. You didn’t propel your hair, makeup or skin flakes all over others and you certainly didn’t get all snooty if someone was offended by your filthy behavour. It was considered the height of bad manners to brush your hair, pick your teeth or sneeze, cough or yawn without covering your mouth. Not anymore. No wonder we have disease coming back tenfold.
So armed with my self righteousness and my anger I decided not to put up with this little arrogant toe rag’s bad manners anymore.
I tapped her on the shoulder and said in a nice clear voice…
‘Would you mind putting that brush away please love, you are showering me in dandruff’
No come back to that one folks. The brush went back in the bag and the girl sunk down in her seat until only the top of her head is visible.
Beauty, now I have a seat with a view.